Should the Time Come

Well, this is my 193 post here at Confessions.

The 193rd post was going to be put together last Friday but it sounded so stupid. Not that this will be any better.

My laptop is still broken, but it is with someone who is trying to resurrect it. I am making money. I am happy. I am helping people. No one (none that I am aware of) is currently upset with me. My husband is happy. Even my dogs seem content. (I guess that is a big part of being a dog though.)

My younger brother's wife is pregnant. So he's gonna be a daddy. Weird. I really am the last sibling to end up with children. The thing is, my life is so full. I can't think of anything I really want to give up. I know the first thing to go for me would be my work with the teens. I guess I have a hard time thinking about kids of my own when there are so many people already born who need my help. I know that I mean a lot to them. They connect with me. They like having a married couple that functions pretty normally and consistently to be around them. I suppose I could keep that part of my life and give up work, but um...I make more money than the husband. We have already discussed that if I do get pregnant, he gets to be Mr. Mom.

The discussion went like this:

Me: J, I make the money to pay the bills and buy your car/musical/electronic toys. I love my work. You hate your job. If I get pregnant, you get to stay at home, okay?

J: Ok.

I wonder if he will remember that. He wasn't making eye contact, just pushing the buttons on his game controlled with a frenzied motion and rabid determination.