Maui!!

I can tell I am getting more rest. I actually have brain capacity to daydream and wish. It is a change from the grind of worrying about the basics of food, sleep and cleanliness. However, day dreaming is dangerous. I found myself wanting a brief vacation and only six weeks into this new momness! I am ready for Baby K to be a bit more independent, but only for a week so I can go to San Diego or Maui. Ahhh....beaches and mai tais. I could just wave my worries and stresses away. I could sleep in again. Just some simple things to look forward to.

I think I have a year to go at least for something like that. And I am sure five hours into an excursion, I would be missing Mr. J and Baby K and would have to turn around and go home immediately.

So this evening I was feeling a wee bit sorry for myself. I gave the dogs a bath, did dishes, did laundry, took out trash, fed changed and burped Baby K countless times today. By this evening, I just wanted someone to make dinner for me. I wanted to take a long bath or have sex or do something normal. I wanted the house to be magically clean and the laundry to put itself away. Just a break where I didn't feel guilty for leaving Mr. J to tend to things just because I didn't want to for a while.

I am grateful that I have a great husband who can help out and is more than willing to. He is constantly telling me, "Amber, just ask for help when you need it." But I feel guilty for not wanting to do it myself. If I don't want to do it, why would anyone else?

On a side note, Mr. J needs to take cooking classes.